Dear Baby #2,
I’m sorry that we haven’t had as much time for you lately. Since you’re still on the inside and haven’t been born yet, sometimes it’s easy for other people to forget about you at least. It’s not easy for me to forget because I can’t move without being reminded that you’re still here. With your sister, I felt like I could enjoy being pregnant and celebrate every little thing she did. I diligently tracked pregnancy apps to see what was going on with her development.
I did some of that earlier with you but now we are in a global crisis situation and I’m not going to lie, it has been stressful. I haven’t been able to track a lot of your development, though I can tell you’re getting big. In fact, because of the world situation, I had to have some of your prenatal appointments via video chat, which definitely wouldn’t have happened with your sister. We didn’t get to measure how big you were getting or hear your heartbeat. I’ll hear it next time though and hopefully I’ll get to go to the office for most of the rest of the pregnancy.
I’m sorry if I have been upset lately at times. I try to calm down but it seems like you have my hormones going crazy anyway and then with everything seeming to have turned upside down, it doesn’t make things easier. I try to eat the best that I can but I haven’t had the energy to be as intentional about it as I once was. You’re just as important to me as your sister is and I wanted to verbalize that so you know.
I try to celebrate you quietly to myself as everyone else is stuck on their own worries and issues. I really enjoy how you have snuggled into one favorite spot on the bottom of my bump and you stay there, as if to say, “I love being so close to Mommy and I don’t want to go anywhere else. This is the best.” Your sister was always flipping around and moving but you seem to remain content where you are. I can feel your tiny legs, arms, elbows, fingers, and toes (at least, I imagine I know the exact body parts) moving around and stretching. There have been a few times when your dad has been sleeping next to me and he’ll do a twitch or stretch in his sleep and I’ll feel you do the same thing. I think you’ll turn out to be more like me though, a little more laid back and taking the world in whereas your dad and sister are always moving at a million miles per minute.
I can’t adequately describe what a true pleasure it is to be your mom and I’m sorry that I haven’t had the leisure time and luxury of enjoying this point in my life. I’m sorry I can’t show you off to friends and family or have people try to touch my bump and admire how you move around. I’m sure someone would want to appreciate how big you’re getting and see all your ultrasound pictures and hear about your particular attributes but nowadays it’s mainly just your dad, sister, and I. I think with the kind of person you are, you wouldn’t mind and would say if you could, “It’s no big deal, Mom. I’m cool just doing my own thing and you’re doing a fine job. I can tell you’re trying to do your best.”
I think you’re going to come out being a stronger person because of this, someone who will learn tough life lessons at an early age but who will be able to handle them. We’re planning on giving you a strong name, a warrior name, one of those that some might roll their eyes at a little but I think you’ll appreciate it on some level, at least. It is yours because it represents the person you are to me and it puts you on a trajectory to be a strong leader. It’s the kind of name that you have to live up to and I know you can do it.
Don’t ever forget that your family will always be here to protect and support you no matter how crazy life gets. I hope you enjoy the rest of your time on the inside and I’ll do my best to make it as pleasant for you as possible. I know I’m so blessed to be having another baby, especially one as wonderful as you. Just because things aren’t always going right in the world doesn’t mean that it isn’t still a good time for you to be growing and about to come into the world. We’re looking forward to you making your splendid appearance! Don’t worry about how the world looks when you come out. Mommy and Daddy will always be here to help you and take care of you.