Kids are Human Too.

By
Maureen Ingham
-
0

Kids are human too.

This four little phrase has changed the way I approach parenting. I’m not sure why it took me so long to realize, but now that my mind understands this, I have so much more patience for the little ones in my life.

When my firstborn developed into a toddler, I wasn’t prepared for the meltdowns, the emotional outbursts, and the opinionated demands.  The second time around, I feel a bit more prepared and have come to terms with the feelings of a 2 or 3 year old.

I try to relate to them the best that I can and also be a few steps ahead of the game. When it comes down to it, we have a lot more in common with toddlers than we think. If we can take a minute to step back and think about how they are feeling, we may find more success in their behavior as well. They have a lot of the same needs and wants that we have each day but need our help to fulfill those needs. Let’s take a look at our similarities! 

  1. They want the blue plate. Anyone else have a toddler that demands a certain color plate for meals and has a meltdown if they don’t get it? I used to think I needed to be firm and say they get the plate that they get, but you know what…I have a favorite coffee cup that I like to reach for each morning and I get to pick it each day. So if you want the blue plate, have the blue plate. Kids are a human too. 
  2. They like snacks. I feel like I am always packing lunches, snacks, or providing nourishment all the time and at every outing. How can they be hungry? We just had lunch?! I think about myself and realize I get hungry often and between meals and when I do, I just grab something. Let them snack. Kids are human too. 
  3. They want to pick out their clothes. When I get up in the morning, I pick out exactly what I want to wear. Sometimes I change more than once. Sometimes clothes feel too tight or too big, so I change. Your toddler feels the same way. Sometimes clothes don’t fit right and they want to change or they want to pick out their own things even if it doesn’t match. Does it really matter? This one took awhile for me to accept, but now that I have life is much easier. Let them decide. Kids are human too. 
  4. They get tired. Ever feel out of it some days or just need a nap? Kids cannot take the hustle and bustle lifestyle that we place on them each day. Recognizing that they need downtime and keeping their schedule predictable and consistent can help them to feel safe. Feeling safe helps them manage their emotions.  As adults, we like to know what comes next and so do our little ones. Kids are human too. 
  5. They have bad days. As parents, we don’t have perfect days. We have days where we wish we could start over or may say the wrong things or react in a way we regret. Let’s give our kids some grace for those days too. They can’t be perfect every day because kids are human too. 
  6. They respond well to praise. Sometimes I am shocked when I hear the way some people talk to their children. In fact, I decided to write this article after I heard someone at the zoo scream at their child and say “What is wrong with you?!” How would you feel as an adult if a friend asked you that? Do you respond well when your boss or spouse raises their voice or puts you down?  Or do you appreciate praise and being recognized when you do something well? If we focus on the things our kids do well, what a change we will see in their behavior. Kids are human too. 
  7. They want to stay home some days. My youngest child has forced me to recognize that kids need days to stay in their pajamas and just play. I am an on the go type of person and my oldest is the same way, but I had to see that not all children are the same and that’s okay. They need days to relax and recharge. Now, some of our best memories are the days we stay home and snuggle and stay in pajamas and build forts. Kids need downtime because they are human too. 
  8. They love affection. Does it make you feel good when you get a hug from your spouse at the end of the day or a warm embrace from a friend you haven’t seen awhile? Yep. Touch makes us feel connected and loved. Being wanted as mommy all the time can be exhausting, but remember the hugs may not be wanted forever. Give them all the hugs because kids are human too. 
  9. They want attention. No toy, show or gadget can take the place of  YOU.  As adults, we want that same amount of undivided attention. Make eye contact. Listen when they talk. Really listen. Put your phone away. They know when we are distracted. Give them the best version of you. Kids are human too. 
  10. They have feelings too. Ever have different feelings throughout the day? Have a glass of wine, a cup of coffee or workout to relieve stress? Kids are still working on coping mechanisms. We have to teach them it’s okay to have feelings and validate those feelings, even if sometimes the feelings seem a bit out there. It helps to take a moment to identify out loud that they are sad or upset because it can help them to understand what they are feeling. We are their role models and we must show them how to manage their feelings and stress because kids are human too.

I am not claiming to be a perfect parent and there are days where my patience does not last as long as I wish it would. But remembering that these precious little people are human too and have the same needs as adults has helped me a great deal when it comes to meltdowns and the stages of parenthood. If you are in the middle of the terrible twos, or you have a threenager at home, try to remember that this time will pass and it really does get easier at age 4! It’s a lifelong journey and we are all in this together 🙂 

Previous article*NSYNC and Beanie Babies: Memories of My Former Self
Next articleEasy Snacks for Busy Moms – Three Recipes to Bring to Your Next Social Event
Maureen Ingham
Maureen Ingham
Maureen Ingham has enjoyed living in the great city of Columbus for nearly 13 years! Originally from Canton, Ohio, Maureen attended Ohio University and will always be a bobcat at heart! After completing her education degree in Athens, she made her way to The Ohio State University to obtain a Masters degree in Special Education. She fell in love with Columbus then and convinced her now husband to join her in this awesome city! She taught 5th grade for 6 years, before deciding to stay home to raise two beautiful girls. Their family has recently moved to Worthington with their two girls and are excited to plant their roots here! Their first daughter, Maeve is 6 and her sister, Reese will soon be 5 years old. They welcomed a son, Miles in March 2020. Maureen has been with The Columbus Moms Blog since the beginning and now enjoys working on editing and events for the blog. She also works as a Postpartum Doula with her sister at a company called Together Wee Grow. They provide night nursing services, as well as daytime support to local families and babies in Columbus. It is a wonderful job to work along her sister and help families with their precious little ones in a vulnerable time period. In between the night shifts, sweeping up crumbs, exploring Columbus, and getting kids to where they need to be, Maureen enjoys working out, trying new recipes and restaurants, traveling, spending time with family, being crafty and trying to help others whenever she can! Maureen has many Columbus favorites. Her go-to restaurant is Third and Hollywood, she enjoys a sweet treat at Sassafrass Bakery or Fox in the Snow, a slice of pizza at Dewey's Pizza and a warm cup of joe at Highline Coffee. A perfect Saturday involves an outdoor activity with her family and trying a new restaurant when they can! She is excited to be a part of an excellent team here at Columbus Moms blog and hopes to be able to inspire mothers that small acts of kindness go a long way in raising their kids and the city they live in!

RELATED ARTICLESMORE FROM AUTHOR