Boys Will Be … Amazon Warrior Princesses (Halloween Costume Edition)

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August of 2019, my four-year-old son came running up to me and my husband with his Halloween costume idea. I’ll admit, I kind of smirked. What four-year-old doesn’t change his mind about his costume a million times in three months?

His costume choice? Wonder Woman.

“Ok,” I thought, “That will definitely change.” 

Here’s the thing: we aren’t a huge “watch all the superhero movies” type of family. I’m not entirely sure how he came across Wonder Woman. If anything, I like Batman and my husband likes Superman.

Spoiler alert: it didn’t change. Not once. 

I won’t say I didn’t have doubts about him being Wonder Woman, and what other kids (or adults) might say about his costume choice, but I wasn’t openly against it. Instead, I did a lot of reading and soul searching about why I had qualms about it at all. 

If my daughter wanted to be Superman or Spiderman … we would applaud her, right? Isn’t that why they sell traditionally “boy” superhero costumes for girls? So why is it so against culture norms for boys to wear traditionally “girl” costumes? And why did I care?

If I’m not going to tell my two-year-old she can’t be Captain America for Halloween, I’m sure as heck not telling my son, he can’t be Wonder Woman.

And as worried as I was about what other people would say, we got more support for the costume than anything else. Our four-year-old didn’t acknowledge when people questioned his costume, instead, he proudly explained who he was while doing dance moves and spins and moves that are definitely not at all related to Wonder Woman … all with no concept of why people might laugh at him.

Since then, I’ve continued to spend a lot of time focusing not on the “gender” portion of what he likes, but what he as an individual, likes. 

  • Violin? Ok. (Though I really recommend not starting in a pandemic.) 
  • Dance? Ok! (Though, it has been hard to find recommended classes that aren’t “superhero” themed for boys.) 
  • Theater? …Let’s wait until the pandemic is over and look into that then.

I have also come to love how openly other parents discuss this as well. From this commercial to this viral TikTok dad.

Oh, and this year’s Halloween costume? 

He’s going to be Elsa.